(sigh)

Well today may mark the end of my tumultuous relationship with my younger sister.  Ok, well maybe not the end, but positively a hiatus.

She's in a place that I remember all too well.  Part of me (while channeling my inner 20 year old) understands what she's going through, but then the other part of me, which is lightyears away from where I was five years ago in my own life-is just perplexed by her selfishness, immaturity, and all that jazz.

I thought I was making a smart move by distancing myself in order to give her enough breathing room and time to grow.  However, now that she's voiced her anguish at feeling "ostracized" from the family, I have to wonder if the constant arguing over life choices and attempts to achieve some semblance of a healthy relationship was indeed the road I should have travelled with her.  It seems as though I cannot win.  I give advice, all in good faith, and I am "mothering" her.  I let her be, and I don't care......

She's accusing me of "changing", almost as though it's a bad thing.  I can only see positive changes in myself that have occured within the past five years.  Do I lack the ability to be objective about my own character?

It's so hard to try to be understanding, and especially supportive, when I just can't agree with most of how she's living her life.  Yes, some of the things she's doing, I have done myself.  But I was different at that age as well.  I was not like her, and as I have matured I have become less and less like her. 

Is it possible to have no common ground with someone who shares your genes, your upbringing, and your family? Is this a phase that will eventually pass or will we continue to travel down opposite forks in the road?

In a time when even our soil and air might not know the truth, the only solace we can take in decision-making about our inner peace is through honest, organic and sustainable farming. I guarantee that if you know the name of the person who picks your carrots and peas, you will feel better and so will your grandchildren.

-- Mario Batali Chef, author and host of Molto Mario and Mario Eats Italy on Food Network.

Ahhh.....how true!!! I found this "The Way I See It" on my cup the other day.  Just thought I'd share.

 

The following is solely based on true events.

Now let's start your day.

Really, in order to fully appreciate this, we'll have to begin with a prelude.  You are exhausted from your daily routine...you're ready to go to bed, and you must put DAUGHTER to bed beforehand.  DAUGHTER, on the other hand, is not the least bit ready for bed.  You have to carry her back and forth across the living room until she finally falls asleep, then it's a game of sorts to get her into bed and sneak out of the room so not to wake her.  You get into your own bed, and when the thoughts of all the things that didn't get done that day finally escape your restless mind, you fall into a deep slumber.  Of course, Daughter's sleep pattern is much different than yours and she wakes up around 2am systematically.  Finally, because you are exhausted and desperate, you bring DAUGHTER into your bed to finish resting. 

In the morning, you are awakened by DAUGHTER pulling your hair, and poking you in your eyes.  You resolve that there will be no way to get DAUGHTER to go back to bed, so you both get up. 

You begin to make Daughter's breakfast.  In the meantime, DAUGHTER has resorted to splashing in Dog' water dish in order to get your attention.  As his oatmeal cooks, you take away the water dish and start to prepare Dog' breakfast as she barks her head off in the meantime.  Daughter's breakfast is ready and you sit down to feed her.  Then you feed Dog and while Dog' eats, DAUGHTER puts his hands in her food, and you have a chance to scarf down about half of your own cold oatmeal in this amount of time. 

You work from home...by the way...and you sit down to check your email to see what is on your agenda for today.  DAUGHTER is very upset by this and rips the keyboard off the desk, and also bites you on your thigh.  You don't have any work related emails yet, so you decide to take a shower.  Well....your choices for bathing include taking a shower while DAUGHTER hangs her head inside the shower, throws any object not affixed to the floor into the shower, and gets water all over herself and the bathroom and also yells for the whole 4 minutes that you are showering, or you can put DAUGHTER in the tub with you and both get clean that way.  You opt for the second option and begin to get DAUGHTER undressed.  She's all set to go, and you're undressing yourself when she pees on the floor.  You clean up that mess, get her into the tub and yourself and the both of you get cleaned up. 

After your shower, you get DAUGHTER lotioned up and dressed. You have to physically restrain her to keep her from getting the lotion from you and eating it.  Keep in mind, for some reason, for each article of clothing that goes ON DAUGHTER, one must consequently come off.  Finally, she's all dressed, besides his shoes, which are a lost cause.  You begin to dress yourself.  In the meantime, DAUGHTER has somehow gotten the bathroom door open and she is ripping off sheets of toilet paper, soaking them in the toilet water and then flinging them around the bathroom.  Not to mention sucking out the water that has soaked halfway up the sleeve of his clean shirt.  So....new shirt for DAUGHTER it is. 

You start to dry your hair but your boss calls.  DAUGHTER intercepts the phone call by picking up the fax line receiver and yelling "HA!!!!!".  Then hanging up on your boss.  You call her back, and she laughs about the incident but you can tell she's actually annoyed.  She needs you to come pick up some materials from the office so you hurriedly finish getting ready while DAUGHTER destroys his room and rips some of his books apart.  You are finally ready, but DAUGHTER has pooped....so you change her, and the funny thing is, she thinks that once his diaper is off, with poop still smeared all over his butt, this would be the best time to get up and run to hide in his closet.  You chase her down clean her up and then proceed to get together the necessities you will need to take a short trip with her.  In the meantime, she has taken off his socks and shoes and done something with your keys.  You locate the socks and shoes, and get those on, and look for your keys for a good twenty minutes before realizing that she had taken those into the bathroom as well and you find them in the shower.  You get Daughter's coat on and then go to let the dog outside.  Remember that the "one on, one off" rule still applies, so when you return from letting the dog out, DAUGHTER still has his coat on, but she has one sock and shoe off.  You put those back on; gather the diaper bag, purse, etc and head out the door. 

Once to your vehicle, you throw everything into the car and then wrestle Daughter into his car seat.  She is intent on holding some toy that is on the floor, because she is yelling, "DAH!!!!" and pointing but every toy you offer she brushes away and insists on said, "DAH" which is apparently SOMEWHERE in the vehicle.  You finally locate it....and Daughter is happy and smiling.  You get yourself in the car and take off.

While driving, you have a good time singing songs and dancing with DAUGHTER.  You arrive at work, and get DAUGHTER out of the car and take her upstairs to the office.  You get there and there are some large signs that you have to take and so you load those on one arm and have DAUGHTER in the other arm and make your way back down to the car.  By this time, DAUGHTER is getting a little cranky because she's just about ready for lunch.  You have to head back home to feed her. 

You return home and start to prepare Daughter's lunch.  She doesn't like to wait...she hangs on your legs as you explain that you're making lunch as fast as you can and that if she'll let go of you, it will enable you to prepare his food in record time! She doesn't seem to go for it.  Finally, it's done.  You buckle her into his highchair and sit down to feed her. For some reason, the array of food you've prepared, which she loved the day before yesterday, is no longer appealing.  Hmmm...I guess his taste buds underwent a major transformation within a matter of days.  Ok...well you finally get her to eat two hunks of organic cheddar cheese, a handful of frozen organic peas and a box of raisins.  Good enough, right?

You clean DAUGHTER up and then try to find something for you to eat. DAUGHTER seems content playing with Dog until she starts shrieking at the top of his lungs because Dog won't let her have her chew toy.  Dog is looking at DAUGHTER like she is some sort of alien, and has no clue what she has done to provoke this reaction.  DAUGHTER begins to hit Dog in the face, and you go over to break it up.  You then coax Dog into her kennel because there's no way you'll be able to prepare your own lunch while also playing referee.  DAUGHTER is surprisingly devastated by Dog being put away. But she was just upset with her, why the sudden change of heart?? You have no clue, but you now have to try to find something to eat while holding DAUGHTER on one hip, and this enables her to see many things on the kitchen counter which are fascinating and she is convinced she must acquire by tugging at you and pointing to things she wants you to hand to her.  It doesn't seem to be working, so she leans forward and looks at you in your face and starts laughing, as if getting you to join in on his fun will ensure that you comply with his requests for said objects. 

Finally, your food is ready.  You sit down at the computer to eat while checking email.  DAUGHTER hates the checking of email.  DAUGHTER pulls the mouse off the desk, and then throws your home phone to the ground.  She then throws herself to the ground and starts crying.  You feel guilty so you offer her a bribe of some of your food in order for you to return an email to your boss.  Then you have to pick her up to keep her from flipping out.  While trying to type back to your boss, she closes the email window seventy two times.  It takes about 45 minutes for you to send a six line email. 

DAUGHTER is so tired she can hardly keep his eyes open, but she refuses to nap.  You have a multitude of work to get done so you are anxious for her to just fall asleep.  You try walking around the house holding her and singing, and rocking her.  She wants to know what everything in the house is called, and if you don't answer her, she'll be furious.  If you really tick her off, count on being bitten on your clavicle so hard that you'll probably have a welt later on in the day, or maybe having your hair pulled out of your head.  Finally, DAUGHTER passes out and you set her down in his crib, and creep out of the room.  If those dam floorboards wake her up, you're going to blow a gasket.

You sit down to finish your work and the phone rings. SHIT!!! Please God don't let her wake up!! It's your boss.  She needs you to go take some photos for a new listing.  Right now.  FUCK!!! FUCK!! FUCK!! You agree.  You finish up what you can of your computer work and then go get DAUGHTER out of bed, and put her in the car.  It's like strapping a 20lb sack of potatoes into a car seat.

You arrive to the location and are relieved that the house is vacant.  DAUGHTER will be able to explore while you take your photos.  You get that done without much effort and return home.  When you get home, you make a point to sit and play with DAUGHTER and read some books.  Of course, she wants to read Green Eggs and Ham but as soon as you begin reading she declares, "END!" and slams the book shut.  So you stop reading, but then she flings the book at you, this process repeats for about 35 minutes. 

Finally it's time to think about what to make for dinner.  You have no clue.  DAUGHTER doesn't want you to prepare dinner, because it means she's not getting his much deserved attention.  You allow DAUGHTER and Dog to play again and they seem to be doing fine, until Dog decides to eat some of your makeup and smear it all over the rug.  DAUGHTER has also taken all of the contents out of your desk drawer and is spreading them around the living room floor while the dog tramples on them.  You leave your food and go to clean up the mess.  As you put things away, DAUGHTER pulls them back out of the drawer.  Nothing is more interesting than the contents of this drawer at this moment in time.  You also realize that DAUGHTER has taken your work phone off the hook and you have no idea how long it has been this way.  You then realize that you also have a message on your work machine and you have to return a call.  You dial the number and sure enough, as soon as the realtor picks up, DAUGHTER begins shrieking in the background.  The realtor laughs but it's almost impossible to carry on a conversation.  The funny thing is, as soon as the phone is hung up, DAUGHTER no longer feels the need to shriek.  Coincidence?? Hmmm.

Dinner's ready and you and DAUGHTER sit down and have a nice meal.  Then you clean her up and decide that you'd like to watch some of the evening news. You turn on the television, which has not been on all day....and Daughter's immediate reaction is to run up to the TV and turn it OFF while exclaiming "ON!!" she does this over and over again and consequently you are unable to truly "watch" anything.  You give up on the idea of enlightening yourself about any current events. 

The evening progresses, you play and read and consequently become quite exhausted.  The nighttime routine ensues.....and then it starts all over again!

"END!!!!"

 

...so today, while indulging in one of my many guilty pleasures (Venti Caramel Macchiato from the local Starbucks to be exact!), I noticed a very poignant "The Way I See It" on the side of my cup.  It read,

Republican President Teddy Roosevelt said in 1907: "The conservation of our natural resources and their proper use constitute the fundamental problem which underlies almost every other problem of our national life."  He placed only Morality higher as a guiding principle.  A United States President who adopts these as our guiding principles globally will lead our nation to further prosperity and peace. 

It was written by Mike Fay, a Wildlife Conservation Society Conservationist and Nationanl Geographic Conservation Fellow. 

First of all, I am ashamed to admit that I do not know much about Teddy Roosevelt as a President.  In fact, I do not know anything about MOST of our country's Presidents, and I know only a little about the more revered Presidents such as Abe Lincoln and JFK.  I do know, however, that the current administration leaves me with a very bad taste in my mouth.  Sometimes I get all fired up about becoming "involved" and doing my part to "change the world" and then other days I look at the state of things, and realize that these people who are in power are not looking out for the best interests of the people, or of the world as a whole, but rather the best interests of themselves.  I want to believe that one day we will have a black president, a woman president, a president who came from poverty, an intelligent president.....and sometimes I am hopeful.  But on the other hand, I often feel as though it's a lost cause.  All of the corruption in our society, in our government.  Money is what makes the world go ‘round.....and the hunger for money is what is turning our world upside down.  How do we turn the tables around?? Where do we begin?  Conservation?? What's that?? Most people opt for convenience over conservation....and the United States' mantra of "bigger is better" makes my stomach turn.  Does anyone have any idea of how the rest of the world is living while we are obliviously talking on our cell phones, while driving our gas guzzling SUVs, and yes, drinking our mondo sized Starbucks' cappuccinos??? Is it socially unacceptable to care? Whose job is it to inform us? Certainly not the government, right??  Or the media? Hmmmph.  

I don't know if Teddy Roosevelt was a "great leader" or not.  But from what I've heard today, at least he sounds like a good man to me.  Maybe while striving for National "greatness" we've overlooked the small things that really matter. Or better yet, maybe we've failed to see that "National Greatness" isn't what matters, AT ALL.  It seems as though "Morals" in this day and age have been disregarded in favor of "rights".  Sure, it might not be the most "morally acceptable" thing to do, but hell, it's a free country, and it's my "right" to do this......Now, I'm all for "freedom" and the such....but where DO we draw the line?  

Who would have known that a midday cappucino would have me feeling so bogged down??